Wednesday, November 05, 2008

I like Japanese Game

(unrelated photos of a Doomodake art exhibit)

I often hang out in the halls of my Junior High in between classes, goofing around with the kids. I taught a whole class how to moonwalk during this 10 minute break a few months ago, so it's definitely worth it... for the kids. It's a time where we can try and communicate in a non-classroom environment.

So today a big group of boys are clowning around. It's been 6 months, so the kids are asking more personal stuff. Questions about sex, boobs, my cock. You know, typical topics for a 12 year old. Today they come up to me and...

"Mr. Brian! Look!"

Then the head of this pack, a young one who I will simply call Smiley, does a sort double handed pantomime of masturbating. It was precious, but as usual, I just played dumb.

"What's that? I don't know. わかりません!"

Then I said something that set it all off.

"Is that like a Japanese game or something?"

It sounds really bad when I write it, but 90% of break time is spent throwing balls, rock-scissor-papering (yeah, it's a verb), or ninja fighting. So to assume something is a game is a valid assumption.

The kids lose it. Smiley is rolling on the ground in laughter. 2 minutes later, and this group of 8 boys are simulating an orgy in the hallway, screaming "Japanese Game!!! Japanese Game!!!" Smiley was fervently dry humping his friend, who was taking it like a champ. I run for the hills (teacher room).

In class, I notice Smiley fellating his pen, letting everyone around him know about Japanese games. It looked kind of like he was brushing his teeth, which makes it kind of cute and scary at the same time. A few girls around him seemed to catch on to it, as they started with the giggles. Luckily today's lesson was telling time, and I transformed into a giant clock (just using my arms as hands on a clock... not that imaginative). The unnecessary use of cuckoo sounds temporarily subdued the rampant sinful thoughts ... for the time being.

I can just imagine him at home tonight at the dinner table. His mom asks him what he learned in school today. (His dad is still working)

"Mr. Brian taught me about... Japanese games. It's like, this awesome code word for all acts of sex. Mr. Brian is the best!"

Then I get arrested and lie to the police. I try and play dumb, as if I don't know what he's talking about. Then they find this blog and deport me. Good times!

1 comment:

Aaron said...

Fucking hilarious. You sure we don't teach at the same school?